August 17, 2009
In Tears
Last night I was in tears when I had to say good bye to my son.
A couple of days ago Matt and I help my son to move to Chapel Hill, North Carolina, he going for his Master in Political Science at University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill
I’m happy for him but I am a little worried about if he gone continuing his treatment. I’m going though a very difficult time, emotional and financial, yet I did what I could and went to make sure he will be fine and comfortable in his dorm room.
At home before we left for North Carolina, I had to help get all this things organized and packing he did little by little but never really finished so I had to finish packing for him. I guessing he does not think like a what we would considered a normal person yet he is very intelligent.
After arriving in North Carolina we stop by the Social Security building for paper work then we dropped him at his dorm room, help with little things then headed back to the hotel. He was tired, and did not join us for a really nice dinner at 411, great Italian food.
The next day we took Luiz breakfast to start his day of shopping…. Walmart, Super Target etc.
I was having a lot of stress and I want to fix everything for him, buying things he needed for his place at Walmart I used my last $100.00 dollars on my visa, next step we went to Super Target for food to buy some more things. Though it wasn’t very funny I had to tell the cashier to stop at different amount to split up on my other cards, because I really don’t have money right now to be doing this kind of thing.
So in Target, I was trying to split the bill onto 3 different credit cards and one was denied, Matt helped me with paying for the last few things. I didn’t care I wanted make sure that he had everything he needed to concentrate on his studies and treatment. Later we stopped into Bed Bath and Beyond and got a great deal on some pots and pans.
Is hard for me to be with my son for long time period without creating a lot of stress on me, he lives in another world and never recognize what I do for him. I do it because I love him so much and I want him to be healthy and happy.
One of the very happy moments for me was when Matt and I took Luiz to dinner, a nice Gourmet dinner at Elaine’s restaurant on Franklin street in Chapel hill to wish him a good luck on his next road of his life, he was very happy and had lobster, but never said thanks for dinner or for the things I brought for him.
Last night I hugged him, I could not control myself and cried asking him please take his medication. I’m asking myself what should I do? to have good communication with him and for him to be healthy etc….I don’t sleep any more, because I am so worried.
I love my son.
